Well, here we are! Let’s just get one thing straight right off the bat — I am no professional writer. There will be errors, misspellings, wrong grammar, and cussin’. But one thing I do know is that I’ll be showing up here as my true, authentic self.
However the words and flow come out is exactly how I’d say them. I do plan to grow as I go — this is my Carrie Bradshaw writer era, baby. What did Doechii say in Nissan Altima?
“I’m like Carrie Bradshaw with a back brace on,
I been carrying you bitches now for way too long.”
Yeah, something like that.
The funny thing about all this is that I actually had a vision of starting a blog back in 2024. I even made a Reddit page but never figured out how to set it up or post anything. I let that dream die out — or so I thought. Fast forward nine months later, I had a whole baby. And here she is: Diary of a Self-Lover.
Now that we got that out of the way, let me formally introduce myself. My name is Shenelle, and I’m 30 years old. (Yikes, I still can’t believe I’m in my 30s — but I digress.)
I am a survivor of a narcissistic, abusive marriage. From that experience came the absolute best gift: my beautiful, sassy, independent 3-year-old (going on 13) daughter. During my healing journey, I prayed for the life I wanted for her and me after such a traumatic chapter — one we’re still navigating, honestly. My priority is protecting her peace in every way I can.
I’ve chosen to share pieces of my life and experiences for others to read, see, and connect with — but that doesn’t mean my daughter has to be subjected to that exposure. What I share of her is exactly that — what I choose to share.
Moving onward… I’m a spiritual baddie navigating life as a woman connected to the Most High, God, my ancestors, spirit guides, the moon, and the stars — all of the damn above. All while mothering, healing, breaking generational cycles, and figuring out how to channel all these spiritual gifts oozing out of my mind, body, and spirit.
It’s all so new to me, and it gets overwhelming sometimes trying to balance it all. So, I journaled. I got a therapist. Then I got dumped by my therapist (yeah, that happened). And now, I’ve basically taken up ChatGPT in her place — and here I am.
I’m a lover girl who still believes in love — but now I have self-worth. Finding myself for the first time in my life has changed everything. I have boundaries. I no longer people-please to be chosen. I’ve put all the love I used to chase from family, friends, and men back into me.
Now, when I catch myself attaching to any form of external validation, I stop, reclaim that energy, and ask myself what triggered me in the first place.
I go through so much shit in my life — and trust me, we’ll talk about it all in real time.
As for my career, I’m in the healthcare field. I always knew I wanted to help people, but before my spiritual awakening, I thought that meant through medicine. And while I love what I do, it doesn’t feel completely fulfilling.
I’ve thought about becoming a personal trainer because of my fitness journey — but that didn’t quite fit either. I even considered becoming a narcissistic abuse life coach, but that still didn’t feel exactly right.
So right now, I’m just showing up as me — sharing all the different aspects of who I am and seeing where it all leads. Because every time I share my story, I get the same response: people connect. Whether they comment, DM, or silently follow along, they see themselves in me.
And that’s powerful. I’ve helped so many women start their healing journey and remember who the fuck they are — and that means everything to me.
I think that’s enough yapping for my intro! I just want to take a moment to thank myself for believing in me and finding a way to make this dream come true.
And to you — thank you for reading my first blog post. Here’s to many more to come.
Asé.
Diary of a Self- Lover 
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